Best and worst of the schuster building toilets

I'm talking during the day. I'm talking number two. Where is the magic going to happen? Let us go on a journey around the University of Manchester Physics Department as we take a look at the bog-standard, starting with the worst:

Ground floor: In its favour, the cubicles are reasonably spacious. This is the only positive I can think of, though. There is a weird layout, it gets extremely busy between ten-minutes-to and the hour due to its proximity to the lecture theatres, and it is a bit out of the way for the rest of the building. Avoid.

First floor: Prime location, being he nearest toilet to not only the library and the computer cluster, but also the first floor lab. This is very much not in it's favour given the task at hand. Plenty of through traffic and dodgy cubicle locks make a visit here an extremely anxious experience.

Fourth floor disabled: The fact it is disabled works both for and against it. This toilet is in effect an oversized cubicle with its own washbasin and all manner of bells and whistles, such as an alarm in case of emergency and handles for sitting and standing. It's not all fun and games though, and there are dire risks involved. Are there any disabled staff or students in the department? I can't say I've noticed, but there's no way to be sure. How can one concentrate when there is such risk of a Larry David-esque confrontation? Another negative is the fact that having a cubicle door that leads straight out into the lift area can lead to a sense of exposure.

Second, Third and Fifth Floors: These are grouped together because of their day dependence. Each of these floors houses a laboratory, meaning that on a given day of the week, any of these could be a no go area. Tuesdays and Thursdays on the fifth floor are best avoided. The third can be slightly unpredictable with its computer and electronics labs. The second floor is my favourite of the three, and I have never experienced any trouble there, even on days when second year students should be in the nuclear lab.

Basement: The connoisseur's choice. The subtle, intriguing positioning with regard to the lifts could threaten to make this an acquired taste, but its décor, well-stocked roll supplies and tranquillity mean that should be first choice for anyone in its vicinity.

N.B. I can't remember what the toilets are like on the 6th or 7th floors, or if they even have any. I have no business going all the way up there. 7th is probably a decent shout actually, but the stairs up there are a bit of a pain. I'll bear it in mind for next time though.